Movies have more importance than you may realise. Yes, they entertain – sometimes they’ll make you angry, sometimes they’ll make you laugh and sometimes they’ll make you cry – but they’ll nearly always teach you a lesson. Here’s our top 10 lessons we’ve learnt from the movies…
You will hate ‘The One’ before finally realising they’re your soul mate / boo / other half. Keep an eye out for anyone you find arrogant, gets on your nerves or has a business competing with yours. You’ll be marrying them before the year is out.
As long as you’re somewhat attractive, have a potential love interest and / or some unresolved issues, you will survive the end of the world. Even if everyone around you is being burned alive by meteors, or giant tsunamis are engulfing your neighbours, you’ll be fine providing you haven’t gotten round to telling that special someone you love them. And if you have a cute dog, your chances are even better because…
… when everyone else is dying, dogs never do. The end of the world, war, runaway cruise liners… your pedigree will live to see another day. He’ll probably hide for a while and it might even seem like a car has fallen on him from the sky, but don’t you worry. He’ll soon turn up unscathed, tail still wagging.
Everyone was born with an innate knowledge of choreography and dance. So when you feel like busting a move, don’t fret! Your nearest and dearest will be able to join in with no rehearsal needed. This goes for singing too. If you want to belt out a spontaneous, created-in-a-split-second song, rest safe in the knowledge that those around you will be backing you up in no time, instruments and all.
Diffusing a bomb is really quite simple, and as long as you’re not colour blind you’ll have no problem. If you are struggling, don’t panic: you will cut the correct wire, just in time. Hint: It’ll always be red or blue.
Ignore everything your mother ever told you about polite phone manner. It isn’t necessary to say hello or goodbye on the phone. It’s quite acceptable to launch straight into your point, and then hang up when you’re done.
Hacking into the CIA, FBI, MI5 or Government databases requires only a laptop, an internet connection, and some precise guesswork. Ideally you should also be able to type at the speed of lightning so that anyone looking over your shoulder won’t know how you did it.
Ladies, if you want to explore a house in the middle of the night, put some clothes on. If you don’t and you choose to walk around in your underwear, you’re going to die. Violently, I’m guessing. A pair of jeans might mean the difference between life and death.
Humans have a deep, inexplicable connection to the weather. When you’re happy, the sun shines bright. When you’re sad, the rain will wash away your tears. If you’re particularly tuned to the forecast, you might even get some thunder and lightning when having a heated discussion.
The Perfect Man does exist. He will be everything you imagine him to be, and more. He’ll clean up after himself, never leave the loo seat up, and always know what you’re thinking without having to ask. He’ll buy you surprise gifts, your parents will love him, and you’ll both live happily ever after.
DISCLAIMER: Some lessons should be taken with a pinch of salt. For example it’s probably best not to tamper with bombs or to attempt Government hacking. And definitely don’t wait for your knight in shining armour to arrive, because even if he does he too will forget to put the toilet seat down.
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