Despite its breathtaking special effects, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is a film riddled with plot holes, poor scripting and mediocre performances. Such downfalls are often skirted over with the inclusion of scantily-clad girls which means, unless you’re a teenage boy, you wont find much more here than a drivelling script. Don’t worry girls, you’re catered for – John Turturro appears in a thong. Lovely.
We enjoy the odd mindless blockbuster but Michael Bay’s stunning effects do little to make up for the meandering script and you may begin to wonder if there’s a plot present at all. For those of you determined to find one, we think it lies around there being some threat to humanity, posed again by the excessively evil Decepticons. An obvious money-spinner, Transformers 2‘s storyline is strung together with explosive actions scenes, but even these get repetitive and pointless. After the death of Optimus Prime the story loses hope, as well as the will to carry on, and Shia LaBeouf is left struggling to hold the film together, running as he does from one scene to the next keeping verbal checks on where the storyline is. We get the feeling his scenes of stuttered facial expressions are less a consequence of the Allspark shard occupying his brain and rather a result of his trying to comprehend the script.
Autobot Bumblebee provides most of the film’s feeble laughs through his broken voice box, but the twee voices and inane twin robots lend themselves to suggest that the writers, if there were any, couldn’t settle on a target-audience; one minute we’re watching as LaBeouf’s Witwicky struggles to save mankind, the next we’re watching an ice cream van have an internal argument. Although based on a toy, the film doesn’t manage kiddy-fare or high octane action well enough to juggle both at the same time.
After nobody seems particularly phased by the appearance (and disappearance) of an ill-explained human transformer and a brief, slightly convenient, back-story, we’re whisked away to Egypt where we’re thrilled to find the script meanders on. The film’s long run time ultimately makes for confusing watching and, although most of the actors struggle valiantly, you may find yourself simply not caring what happens to any of the characters, little being provided in its two hours and twenty minutes to make us worry about the their safety. One of the problems inherent in the saga is the fact that it is very difficult to distinguish the goodies from the baddies in the raging fight scenes which means, after the first few, you’ll be left waiting for the credits to roll.
Despite a drawn out finale, the conclusion is rushed and left open for Transformers 3 which is out 29th June 2011. Transformers 2 is enjoyable if you’re looking for a tedious action film but we’d skip it if you were looking for a film with substance.
Best line: ‘Mean robots suck’.